Grateful for Pink!

Today as I watch the life of Elizabeth Edwards on t.v. (who passed away yesterday from breast cancer) I am reminded once again of my own mortality. Cancer seems like it is just everywhere I turn. One of my best friends lost her Dad yesterday to this horrible thing and I have lost 6 people in the last year that I have come to know on my journey. It is a frigntening thing if you let it be. But, I try everyday to block it out and just embrace my good fortune. October was a tough month for me. It was breast cancer awareness month and everywhere I WENT there was pink pink pink. There was even a pink ribbon on the butter I bought at the grocery store. I could not escape the pink. Although I am so grateful for what the pink ribbon stands for I just was glad when it was over. Does that sound strange? I don't know. I am just being honest. I also have been thinking a lot lately about my Mema who died from breast cancer in 1984. I was in the 8th grade at the time. That age for a girl is a tough one. I was just blossoming as a woman and thought the world revolved around me. I knew my Mema had breast cancer, but she kept it really private and I didn't know much about what she was going through. I just knew she was sick. Oh how I wish I could tell her I am sorry for not being more sympathetic as a preteen. My Mom tells me that she didn't want anyone to know. No one talked about the breast cancer back then. It was a hush hush thing. My Mema had no pink ribbons. She had no support group or breast cancer walk to participate in. They did not exist. She didn't have a list of phone numbers of other women she could call with this disease day or night. I suspect she felt really alone. There was no anti nauseau medicine for her. She had to endure the side effects of chemo on her own. There were no alternative therapies like Herceptin that I had. There was no reconstruction surgeries. She told my Mom that she would start getting sick on her way to her chemo treatment just thinking about it. So, I realize how selfish I am about letting the pink ribbons upset me. They should remind me how far we have come in treating this horrible thing. They should remind me that I should be grateful I have the opportunites with my treatments that I had. They remind me now of a beautiful woman named Mamie Ophelia who endured this horrilbe journey on her own and with nothing more than her own strength and the strength of her family. So, thank you Mema! Thank you Elizabeth! Thank you Susan G.!Thank you to all those that have gone on after battling this thing. You have made the path easier for the rest of us. I am now grateful for my butter with the pink ribbon :) I love everyone who reads this.