MD ANDERSON

Well, Stan and I survived 4 full long days at MDA. The first night we arrived we checked into our hotel, which was very nice and connected to MDA. When we pulled up for the valet to park my car, for a split second I had to remind myself we were not on a vacation. We were at a medical center. The hotel is connected to MDA by a skybridge so we were able to go to all appointments without even going outside. So convenient and so very nice. But, I have to admit, the first night as we were roaming around this massive place trying to figure out where we were supposed to be at seven a.m. the next morning, I was crying wanting to go home. Stan said absolutley not! We found a security gaurd that actually left his post to take us up to where we were supposed to be bright and early. Thank you Mr. Security gaurd! God bless him. So, the next morning we wake up and start walking to my new breast cancer doctor, Dr. Valero's office, at 6:30 a.m. At 7:00 am we are all checked in and see Dr. Valero at 8:00. Hardly any waiting. The waiting room of the breast cancer wing can be described as an airport terminal waiting area. It's massive. Filled with couches, recliners, fish tanks, waterfalls, sculptures, etc. very peaceful and very relaxing. As I am sitting in the waiting area with about 75 other women I notice that almost all them look my age or younger! What is happening to this generation with breast cancer????? I get called back to a room and put on a gown and the first thing the RN says when she walks in is "Oh, my! You are just a baby!" Then Dr. Valero comes in. Very distinguished gentlemen. His accent sounds like he is from Columbia. He has already been studying my reports and consulting with my other oncologist from home and knows all about me. I was impressed. He basically tells us that the treatments I was originally given didn't work. He said he would have given me the exact same treatments had he treated me first. But, some people's bodies and cancers just respond differently. Basically, cancer can do whatever it wants to. So, he wants to hit it hard with a very aggressive approach and try to shrink tumor and then have a liver oncologist surgeon then remove it. Then more chemo. So, we set up to see the liver onc the next day. But, in the mean time we are going to be doing lots of scanning and bloodwork over the next two days.So, we go back out and wait and they give me my schedule of where I am to be and what time. I am stuck so many times over the next two days and scanned everything. It was fast and furious. One of my scans was scheduled for 8:40 p.m. the second night. So, we go to the wing where everyone is waiting to get scanned and that is when I start seeing people that are so sick and frail. I even saw a little boy about my Cole's age pulling around an i.v. pump. Just heartbreaking. But, I also saw lots and lots of LOVE everywhere!! The night scan apt. was my hardest one. We get there on time and after I check in I see Stan sitting in a chair on the phone and can tell something is wrong by the look on his face. I realize he is talking to my Dad. There are probably 100 people in this room and I go "Oh No! What's wrong?" He tells me that my Allie has been taken to the e.r. in Abilene during a basketball game due to asthma attack! "OH Jesus!" is all I can think. I go over in the corner and talk to my Dad on the phone and he assures me she is okay. Her Dad, Jeff, is there with her and my Mom is too. My Dad has Cole in the waiting room. I cry my eyes out. I go sit down and this woman who is sitting across from me hands me a book. She says , "I just feel lead to give you this." She is crying too. I just open it up to the middle and the first thing I see is this: "We live through the dark by what we learned in the light." WOW! She definately was an angel. God bless her. Allie gets better and is released and I don't get back to my scan until 10:00 p.m. I am able to be still and stay in the machine for 30 minutes. That was a tough day. I find out when I get back to Abilene that my sister was at the e.r. too with Allie and outside the e.r. talking to a pastor that one of her friends had call her. He prayed for me for 30 minutes over the phone to Amy. So, prayer was working. God bless you pastor Hailey! I don't even know you. When we head back to our hotel room via the skybridge(which is about a 10 minute walk) I am exhausted. My Stan pushes me in a wheelchair all the way back. We go to bed and prepare to meet the liver oncologist the next morning. Well, the liver doctor's name is Dr. Curly. So, I was rather curious to see what he looked like. He was a normal looking man and came in with three assistants. He shows me my liver scan from the night before and shows me the spot that is cancer. He says that it is less than one inch in diameter and it is in a perfect place for removal. He explained that had it been close to a vein in my liver he would not have been able to remove it. So, that is the first good news I have gotten in two weeks! I can breath again. So, we decide to do three rounds of chemo in Abilene then go back to MDA and they will scan me and see if it is shrinking and make sure nothing else has popped up. If all looks good I will come home and do one more round of chemo. Then rest my body for a month and go back to MDA for the surgery. I will be in the hospital anywhere from 5-7 days. So, now I have a plan! I do so much better with a plan. kind of. We have one more apt. the next day back with Dr. Valero to finalize everything and then I get to go home! At the last apt. with Dr. Valero he tells me the chemos I will do and also tells me that my blood work showed NO cancer cells in my blood! Another piece of good news. Tumor markers are still elevated, but no cancer cells in blood. Remember tumor markers are just vapors that stupid tumor is giving off. One afternoon while we were waiting Stan and I find the chapel. It is so beautiful. Stained glass, prayer benches and so quiet. I was so impressed at how many nurses were in there praying! It gave me such a comfort that these nurses would take time out to come in and pray. It really was peaceful there. So, we head back home and it is a long long drive............Get home at 1:00 a.m. and go to bed. I wake up at 7:00a.m. and head over to my Mom's to see Cole. This is the first time I have ver been away from him. I go in and he is sleeping. I lay by him and just stare at him. I whisper to him as I rub his little forehead "Cole, it's Mommy." and he says without opening his eyes, "mommy," Then he said "where's Mimi?" So blessed that he made it through those days so easy. He got really attached to his MiMi who is the biggest angel in my life. God bless her. I wouldn't leave him anywhere else. So, now we head in Wed. for the big chemo plan. One of my chemos is known as the Red devil. So, please please pray for me to tolerate this. I had to quit googling it because I was making myself sick just reading about it. So, I am just gonna get through it somehow. People do it everyday. I will update in a couple of weeks. I love each of you. I can't explain how much the prayers mean and I feel them all the time. I had so many wonderful encounters with people at MDA that I am certain were angels in disguise that I know God put in my path. So, now we prepare for the battle ahead. I would be lying if I said I wasn't afraid. But, at least I can do it here at home and I am so grateful for my family.